Drunk like Chimps
by IceCrome
Summary: Sakura and Naruto get really, really hammered. And who has to drag their sorry asses home? That's right. I'm not telling you. [ONESHOT] [Still good at those summaries. :D]


**I really love that song. I really do.**

**Everything © their rightful owner(s). **

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"Naruto, why in the _hell_ are we here again?" Sakura asked, folding her arms. They were both eighteen now, and they were going to celebrate bringing their friend Sasuke back. It took them a long time, and a hell lot of persuasion, but they got him.

They were celebrating in a dingy karaoke bar.

"We must celebrate my dear Sakura! We were finally able to bring Sasuke-asshole back!"

"But, couldn't we have had like, cake and ice cream?"

"But what's wrong with my idea?" Sakura tapped her foot on the dirty asphalt ground, and sighed.

"First off, most of your ideas suck. Secondly, this place looks infested with Hepatitis and Syphilis. Third, I would rather have cake. I've had this craving all day long. And last, drunk guys _will_ try to grab my ass." He stood with a finger pointed in the air. He couldn't really compete with that.

So, he used the only thing he knew:

"SUPER SWEET NINJA ART GO!-no jutsu." He did weird hand signs.

_Somehow, _they were proven ineffective.

"Naruto, what are you doing?" She said, annoyed. Naruto was dancing around her.

"Goooo innntoooo the clluuuuuubbb…"

"Alright, fine! I'll go into the freakin' club! This had better be good!"

"Don't worry, Sasuke's there."

"Fine…"

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"'Ey Sasuke! We're 'ere!" The young Uchiha smirked.

"About damn time." The dank, small club had lights blasting everywhere. Sasuke was leaning up against a wall.

"Sorry, it took awhile to get Ms. PMS over here to come in-." Sakura grabbed him by the ear, and pulled him over to Sasuke. "Ow! Ow! I'm sorry, I'm sorry! Geez…"

"It's good having you back, Sasuke." She smiled sweetly at him.

"Hn…kinda good to be back." Naruto looked over at a bar.

"HEY, FREE SAKE!" He ran over to it. Thank god the drinking age was eighteen.

"I just hope Naruto doesn't make an ass out of himself."

"As do I, Sakura. As do I."

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"WOOOOOOOOOO!" Sakura slapped her forehead. He had made an ass out of himself.

"NARUTO! GET OFF THE STAGE!" She yelled, proving ineffective.

"Saku-Sakura…whyyy do you want to ru-_hic_-ruin my singing careeerrr?"

"Because you so obviously have no singing career." Sasuke said.

"Hey Sasuke, logic-_hic_-has a brother. His name is shut the hell up!" Naruto brokenly walked over to the microphone stand.

"Oh God Oh God Oh God Oh God…" She covered her face in her hands, and peeked out from in-between her fingers.

"…hey, is that Journey?" Someone said. She stood up, and went over to the bar.

"Just give me two bottles. I'm going to need them." Naruto started to sing. Horribly and off key…but sang.

_Just a small town girl  
Livin' in a lonely world  
She took the midnight train  
Goin' anywhere  
Just a city boy  
Born and raised in South Detroit  
He took the midnight train  
Goin' anywhere_

Sakura downed the bottles faster.

_A singer in a smokey room  
A smell of wine and cheap perfume  
For a smile they can share the night  
It goes on and on and on and on_

_Strangers waiting  
Up and down the boulevard  
Their shadows searching  
In the night  
Streetlights, people  
Livin' just to find emotion  
Hidin', somewhere in the night_

_Workin' hard to get my fill  
Everybody wants a thrill  
Payin' anything to roll the dice  
Just one more time  
Some will win  
Some will lose  
Some were born to sing the blues  
Oh, the movie never ends  
It goes on and on and on and on_

People raised their lighters. And Sakura asked for another bottle of Sake.

_Strangers waiting  
Up and down the boulevard  
Their shadows searching  
In the night  
Streetlights, people  
Livin' just to find emotion  
Hidin', somewhere in the night_

_Don't stop believin'  
Hold on to the feelin'  
Streetlights, people  
Don't stop believin'  
Hold on  
Streetlights, people_

"WOOO! NARUTO THAT WAS-_hic-_GREAT!" Sakura shouted.

"You re-_hic-_really mean so_-hic-_ Sakura?"

"Of_-hic_- course I do you_-hic_- silly head!" Sasuke sighed. They were both drunk as shit. And he had to drag them home.

"Naruto, come on." He got onstage and drug him off.

"Hey-hey, what…what are you doing…the people…it's rude to….people…" Naruto lazily got Sasuke's arm off his back.

"You're drunk."

"You're _sexy_." Sasuke sighed.

"Sakura, come on…" She didn't follow. Instead, she got onstage, and sang the theme to M-A-S-H.

"CAUSE SUICIDE IS PAINLESS. IT BRINGS OUR MANY CHANGES…AND I CAN MAKE A LIVING IF I PLEAASEE!" She sang in an extremely high-pitched voice.

"GO-_hic_-SAKURA!" He got onstage, and drug her off.

"Sakura, what the hell?!" Sasuke said.

"I liiiiikke youuuu Sasukkkeeeee…" She said sleepily. He sighed again.

"I know Sakura…I know."

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"Oh Man….what'd I do last night?" Sakura grabbed her head. It hurt like shit. She got up and went to make some coffee. The phone rang, and she clutched her head.

"What?!" She snapped.

"Ugh…Sakura, don't yell."

"Oh, hey Naruto…I've just got this splitting headache…"

"Me too. What happened last night?" Sasuke was in her house.

"You guys acted like drunken idiots. Sakura, you had like, eight bottles of sake, and Naruto got onstage of a Karaoke bar and sang _Don't Stop Believing_."

"But what are you doing here?"

"I dragged both your drunken asses home. I stayed with you because you were muttering something about making out with me if I stayed with you." She made an 'O' shape with her mouth.

"So you and I made out?" He nodded.

"Sweet!"

"So we basically had the best night of our lives, every last night, right?" Naruto said on the phone.

"Yes. Basically."

"You know there's only one thing to do…"

"Oh yes…I know…"

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_Later that day…_

It was ten o' clock. Teams Eight, Gai, and Ten were there.

"What the hell are we doing here?" Kiba asked.

"I don't know…" Hinata answered. They turned their attention to a drunken Sasuke. He opened his mouth, started to sing horribly, and…

_JUST A SMALL TOWN GIRL…_

_LIVIN' IN A LONELY WOOORLD…_

_SHE TOOK THE MIDNIGHT TRAIN _

_GOING ANY-EY-WHEEERE…_

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**I really love that song. I really do. And a drunk Sasuke? Friggin Priceless!**

**So R&R and such. Flame me if you think I care. **


End file.
